Crossing My Jordan River
I AM IN AWE OF YOUR LORD! YOUR FAITHFULNESS JUST BLOWS MY MIND! I've been asking you to show me how much you love me, just how important I am to you. You have been doing just that by doing as Beth Moore calls "God Stops." A "God Stop" (or G.S. for short) is any way God discloses Himself to me. Let me start explaining my G.S. for June 27, 2011...
I've been thinking of the past. I've been learning how to get over hurts, hangups and strongholds, etc The past 6 months that we've lived in TN has been an amazing time of healing for me, all due to the guidance of the Lord of course. Last week the Lord led me to Psamls 78:3,4 "things we have heard and known, things our ancestors have told us. We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, his power, and the wonders he has done." I have a desire to teach Emery that the Lord is faithful.
I read the daily verse sent to my phone this morning before getting out of bed. I was led to look at the current Bible reading plans and ended up with a 5 day plan called "Remembering All God Has Done." I'll admit I read the words of the devotional but not the scripture to go along. I looked at Neal and told him that I feel God wants us, individually and together as a couple, to do this study and to remember, write down, all that God has done for us. That is the reason I started blogging, to have a journal of God's faithfulness as a reminder to myself and one day for Emery.
So today I was depressed, no reason other then a lot on my mind I guess. Maybe depressed is a strong word, distracted and overwhelmed would be better. A lot has happened the past week or so relational wise with my father and God has done a lot of work on my heart, which is always good but has in deed been exhausting. Today I felt like I was just stuck or spinning my wheels. In the past I had felt this way for so long for numerous reasons and today I felt like I was actually going backwards instead of forward. Praise God that I had not felt that way in a long time though!
I get to Bible study tonight, Believing God by Beth Moore. Today's study was titled "Believing God Has Been There All Along" with scripture reference to Joshua 4: 1-24. This is the story of Joshua leading the Israelites to cross the Jordan river. As soon as a foot was set in the river the waters parted for them to cross. When they crossed, God appointed 12 men (one from each tribe of Israel) to go back to the middle of the river to get stones. These men where to each get a stone, so 12 stones in all. Later the purpose of these stones is explained in verse 6 "to serve as a sign among you. In the future when your children ask you, 'What do these stones mean?' tell them...these stones are to be a memorial of the people of Israel forever." These stones were for remembrance of what the Lord has done.
Beth then talks about having an inheritance for your children (goes back to last week when Psalm 78, above, was laid on my heart). She then looks into the camera and says that there are people out there who are listening and are standing in the middle of the river and how they have just stopped. They don't know if they want to go forward or go back. This can also be in reference to how the Israelites felt when they came to the Jordan River. She said, "The middle can represent the halfway point, the place of sudden doubt and indecision. Some of you are already halfway across the river but now stuck. You have a choice to make, to either go forward to your Promised Land and what the Lord has set aside for you or to sit back in your strongholds." WOW! I realized this was what was wrong with me today. To go forward is taking baby steps at overcoming my strongholds. I'd fail if it were not for Lord holding me in His arms every single step/thought of the way. I could always go back too. Today I was standing in the middle of my Jordan River.
Beth then pointed out "Sometimes we are wisest to hurry over" or hurry out of that Jordan, forward of course, not back.
I said to the Lord, "What are my strongholds? I forget, though I know I wrote them down at one point." At a women's retreat last year we were led to write down our strongholds on a piece of material. I didn't have a clue where that material was but I was hoping to find it.
After realization of all of this I went home and told Neal. Earlier today I went through organizing things and found my old Bible. After a few more sentences with Neal I look up and there is my old Bible. I look inside and see the piece of material that has my strongholds written down!
In awe, I then went into my room for some quite time with the Lord. I look at the devotional I didn't finish this morning and finally looked at the scripture reference, Joshua 4: 1-24. With tears in my eyes, tears of awe, I told Neal this. He then said, "Hey Jess....ask me what I was reading last night in my Bible." I asked and he said Joshua, chapter 1-5/6.
Before all of these trials from the past 7 years even started I knew things were going to be rough. BUT I knew that I couldn't shy away from them because I knew in my heart of hearts, as James talks about, that trials should be considered joy. Verses 3-4 says, "because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." The testing of my faith has certainly brought about perseverance and I know that the 2nd half of the Jordan River, the half that's in front of me, will only make me more mature and complete in the Lord. I will never be perfected but I look forward to the day when I pray I will hear, "Well done good and faithful servant."
A month or so before we moved to TN God was testing my faith. He led me to the story of Abraham and how He called Abraham to a new land and promised many things. God was calling me to TN, to trust God. To trust Him 100%. I didn't know anyone but my parents and sister. We didn't have any friends nor did we have a church or church family. I didn't know what our future would look like but I felt in my spirit that if I just trusted the Lord, followed Him to this new land, that I would be blessed and would find Him at the next level. And what do you know...just as God was in MD when we left He was in TN with His arms wide open, proud of me and my obedience and trust in Him. He has poured out so many blessings already in the first 6 months that we've been here. I just can't imagine all He will reveal to me as I take baby steps forward, to finish crossing my Jordan.
I've been thinking of the past. I've been learning how to get over hurts, hangups and strongholds, etc The past 6 months that we've lived in TN has been an amazing time of healing for me, all due to the guidance of the Lord of course. Last week the Lord led me to Psamls 78:3,4 "things we have heard and known, things our ancestors have told us. We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, his power, and the wonders he has done." I have a desire to teach Emery that the Lord is faithful.
I read the daily verse sent to my phone this morning before getting out of bed. I was led to look at the current Bible reading plans and ended up with a 5 day plan called "Remembering All God Has Done." I'll admit I read the words of the devotional but not the scripture to go along. I looked at Neal and told him that I feel God wants us, individually and together as a couple, to do this study and to remember, write down, all that God has done for us. That is the reason I started blogging, to have a journal of God's faithfulness as a reminder to myself and one day for Emery.
So today I was depressed, no reason other then a lot on my mind I guess. Maybe depressed is a strong word, distracted and overwhelmed would be better. A lot has happened the past week or so relational wise with my father and God has done a lot of work on my heart, which is always good but has in deed been exhausting. Today I felt like I was just stuck or spinning my wheels. In the past I had felt this way for so long for numerous reasons and today I felt like I was actually going backwards instead of forward. Praise God that I had not felt that way in a long time though!
I get to Bible study tonight, Believing God by Beth Moore. Today's study was titled "Believing God Has Been There All Along" with scripture reference to Joshua 4: 1-24. This is the story of Joshua leading the Israelites to cross the Jordan river. As soon as a foot was set in the river the waters parted for them to cross. When they crossed, God appointed 12 men (one from each tribe of Israel) to go back to the middle of the river to get stones. These men where to each get a stone, so 12 stones in all. Later the purpose of these stones is explained in verse 6 "to serve as a sign among you. In the future when your children ask you, 'What do these stones mean?' tell them...these stones are to be a memorial of the people of Israel forever." These stones were for remembrance of what the Lord has done.
Beth then talks about having an inheritance for your children (goes back to last week when Psalm 78, above, was laid on my heart). She then looks into the camera and says that there are people out there who are listening and are standing in the middle of the river and how they have just stopped. They don't know if they want to go forward or go back. This can also be in reference to how the Israelites felt when they came to the Jordan River. She said, "The middle can represent the halfway point, the place of sudden doubt and indecision. Some of you are already halfway across the river but now stuck. You have a choice to make, to either go forward to your Promised Land and what the Lord has set aside for you or to sit back in your strongholds." WOW! I realized this was what was wrong with me today. To go forward is taking baby steps at overcoming my strongholds. I'd fail if it were not for Lord holding me in His arms every single step/thought of the way. I could always go back too. Today I was standing in the middle of my Jordan River.
Beth then pointed out "Sometimes we are wisest to hurry over" or hurry out of that Jordan, forward of course, not back.
I said to the Lord, "What are my strongholds? I forget, though I know I wrote them down at one point." At a women's retreat last year we were led to write down our strongholds on a piece of material. I didn't have a clue where that material was but I was hoping to find it.
After realization of all of this I went home and told Neal. Earlier today I went through organizing things and found my old Bible. After a few more sentences with Neal I look up and there is my old Bible. I look inside and see the piece of material that has my strongholds written down!
In awe, I then went into my room for some quite time with the Lord. I look at the devotional I didn't finish this morning and finally looked at the scripture reference, Joshua 4: 1-24. With tears in my eyes, tears of awe, I told Neal this. He then said, "Hey Jess....ask me what I was reading last night in my Bible." I asked and he said Joshua, chapter 1-5/6.
Before all of these trials from the past 7 years even started I knew things were going to be rough. BUT I knew that I couldn't shy away from them because I knew in my heart of hearts, as James talks about, that trials should be considered joy. Verses 3-4 says, "because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." The testing of my faith has certainly brought about perseverance and I know that the 2nd half of the Jordan River, the half that's in front of me, will only make me more mature and complete in the Lord. I will never be perfected but I look forward to the day when I pray I will hear, "Well done good and faithful servant."
A month or so before we moved to TN God was testing my faith. He led me to the story of Abraham and how He called Abraham to a new land and promised many things. God was calling me to TN, to trust God. To trust Him 100%. I didn't know anyone but my parents and sister. We didn't have any friends nor did we have a church or church family. I didn't know what our future would look like but I felt in my spirit that if I just trusted the Lord, followed Him to this new land, that I would be blessed and would find Him at the next level. And what do you know...just as God was in MD when we left He was in TN with His arms wide open, proud of me and my obedience and trust in Him. He has poured out so many blessings already in the first 6 months that we've been here. I just can't imagine all He will reveal to me as I take baby steps forward, to finish crossing my Jordan.
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